One of my Literature don during my undergraduate days at KU- the sagacious Dr Egara Kabaji- would never tire of reminding us that the Bible is the greatest work of Literature ever written.No book in the Western literary canon beats the Holy Book in richness of character, sense of the dramatic and the timelessness of the themes.
Take for example that bunch of 12 fellows around Jesus we call Apostles.From asking Jesus who he is to denying him to selling him to Pharisees at thirty cents like a starving kienyeji chicken,theres no telling what they will do next.
One Friday evening, Jesus goes down to Bethany for a house party to celebrate the raising of Lazarus from the dead.His host is Simon the leper.Together they recline on the couches, discussing politics,watching Citizen Nipashe Jerusalem edition.Mrs Simon is in the kitchen preparing chapos,minji and maini.
All of a sudden, an unnamed woman bursts into the room.She is of ill morals; you might as well call her the reigning slay queen of Bethany.She is not in the guests list- Mrs Simon the host cannot recall sms-ing her an invite to the party.Neither did Simon invite her.When Mrs Simon comes from the kitchen she msscheeews loudly at her.
Unperturbed, she rolls her eyes at Mrs Simon and then washes Jesus feet with very expensive oil fortified with aloe vera and lanolin.Unashamedly, she wipes his holy feet with her flowing hair. Then,like the priestess of ecstasies she is,she gives Jesus a hair raising leg massage.With her Oppal phone,she then takes a selfie with Jesus and uploads it on Instagram and tags her squad .Then, fast as comes, she slays into the night into another bash.
Then follows the most interesting part.The disciples are not amused and ask amongst themselves:
” Why all these waste?”
” That perfume could have been sold and the money given to the poor of Mukuru kwa Njenga.Or the starving children of Dadaab”.
That was Judas the accountant.
When Jesus admonishes them, they take the discussion about the slay queen to their Apostles Whatsapp group.Judas,with his kiherehere, posts;
” Sasa huyu slay queen ametoka wapi?”
Peter the Rock replies;
” Mtu akipendwa na bae wake kuna makosa gani?’
Simon,ever the cynic, posts;
” Yenyewe hakuna mwanaumme hana mpango”.
All the while, Jesus is typing….
Judas leaves the group and goes out to look for a keg joint in backstreet Bethany before Pontio Pilates cops start arresting drunks for ” saa mbaya”.
Matthew the group Admin says that all group members should keep of slay queens and promptly removes Jesus from the group.Luke the medic argues that foot massages are good for circulation since Jesus walks alot.Mark responds that a man should get a tingling foot massage from his wife, not from random slay queens with dubious oils.The Whatsapp debate rages late into the night and by the time they get to Jerusalem,the 12 are in no talking terms.
Despite all the time the 12 fellows have been with Jesus, they still dont trust him.They dont trust him with a woman, yet they know he is God.In addition, they view the silent adoration of Jesus by the unnamed woman with suspicion,envy and sceptism.
Human beings will always be sceptical of your motives.Trust them anyhow.But dont trust the LITTLE DEVIL in each of them.
Happy Lent folks.